Common tests -.-

This week was full of common tests.
And apparently, results are bad.
I need time to buck up.
Perhaps, Mr. Wong's method would
work. Shall try it out.
Since i got no choice, because i only can
manage my time after i step down.
So lazy to elaborate on other issues,
because im rushing my homeworks.
And amaths common test on Monday.
Double G.
Rights, update when im free.
Bye.

A Wonder

Hi people!
So yesterday was cny and bday.
Skip elaborating.
Thanks ppl for the msgs again! :D
So went to cousins house in the night again.
They actually watched Sherlock homes.
I wanted to watch like the others, but
once relatives from grandma's sister side came
for visiting, it was just too awkward to sit down
and continue watching like nothing happened.
Since there were just too many people,
Travis and I went hunting for chairs in the house.
So we eventually found, and carried it down the stairs.
How awesome. Since was busy in a way, Travis and I decided to
give sherlock homes a miss.
So went to play cards instead.
& We also actually Played guess the number.
Person who guessed the number had to drink
one packet of Lemon barley within 15 seconds.
Totally epic fail for sister. She didnt even managed to do it
within 30s.
After one round only, we decided to just play music and get high.
Suddenly Uncle came over to show us magic with the cards.
Im amazed. Like Wow.
So chit chatted, ate and slacked till relatives went off.
Watched the last part of sherlock homes and went home.
Homed and onlined till 1am plus.
Knocked off.

Today.
Woke up around 9.30am.
Msn-ed, slacked and watched tv.
Lunch and get to revise CL.
Catch HSM 1 and 2 on tv!
Currently taking a break.
Gonna revise for Amaths test later.
And before i go off,

HAPPY 15 BIRTHDAY YANQI! :D
bye.

I wonder what you think.
I wonder how you feel.
I wonder if you care.
I wonder what if i lose
the one that i trust, which is you.
I want to tell you how i feel.
But it is just too hard to do so.
Because even i am getting confused
of what im feeling.
You get it?

Chinese New Year Eve

Hey people~
So yesterday was chinese new year eve.
Slacked the whole day at home untill in the night,
went for reunion dinner.
So we were the last to reach.
Sorry!
First thing i did after i took off my shoes,
i ran towards my grandma and hugged her!
I bet she's super happy and touched! :D
So just nice, they were bringing out the food.
For once, i feel so awkward with Luna and Travis.
Seems like something is happening.
And so i got no idea, what to say also.
And to add on, everyone is in different groups
doing different things.
And plus, Luna and Travis looked pissed off.
Weird enough, brother asked me what happen,
like as if i know!
Rights. So i was standing around, observing.
And Travis was observing me too!
He went to tell Luna that i looked very tall, taller than him.
And i only know at a later time.
So finally Luna called me to help her.
Which i feel better, knowing that everything is alright now.

So we took our share and off to the teens table!
We are separated into adults, teens and children table
since there's too many people.
So was in between Luna and Sister.
And we started eating and talking about real random stuffs.
And thats when Luna asked about my height.
And thats when i know about it.
Random~
After eating the first round, i was insane enough to
go for second round with brother.
So, after second round, sat down talked to Aunt Simone!
She asked about my studies and life.
And suddenly she said: Finally! You wore skirt.
You look better in skirts, more feminine. You change your image.
So, i wasnt allowed to wear pants in her house anymore.
Thats bad! :(
Alright, so continued chatting.
Suddenly she asked me if i wanted red bean soup
since nobody is eating it.
And since im so kind, i obviously say alright.
She took for me. And i was being so sociable.
I actually took the red bean soup and walk around
to talk to the rest. :D
Finished, full enough.
Then went upstairs to find my cousins.
And cool enough, all were using laptops/Computers.
Talked to Luna and others who had nothing to do, but watching
them play online games.
Super boring, went downstairs again.

Aunt Simone initally planned to sabotaged Mum,
by getting her maid to get a big bowl of red bean soup
for her, since i had my share already.
End up, when the red bean soup was on the table,
Mum pushed it to me to drink.
She forced me to. In the end, no choice. Finish it,
gonna explode. -.-
So suddenly Luna came and said: Peiyi. Im craving for ice cream!
First reaction: Screams! Me too!
After my reply, we screamed again!
So, guess we all know what happen.
We obviously went to buy.
Walked there and back.
Ate ice cream, drank sprite together.
What a combination!
So obviously, was super bloated.

Continued chatting with my other Aunts.
Talked till 11pm.
By the time i reached home, was 12am already.
But, i still onlined msn till 1am plus.
Cool or what! HAHA.
So during the time, keep receiving happy birthday msgs.
Thanks ppl. I appreciate it alot! Love you ppl :D

So right now, im going to slack for a little more
then lunch.
After lunch, i got to study for tests. And at night,
going to grandma house.
Get my ang baos!
HAHA bye!

Sooner or later

Right. So before cny,
i got my presents of course.
Thanks to ppl who gave me
my birthday present today.
I appreciate it alot, and obviously im touched.
Okay. So according to sequence.
In the morning. Walked into the school,
received phone call from dearest yiling.
First present received was from
Dearest Yiling + Stella, then by Sibing and
then from Edna+ Zoey Leow and Zoey Peh.
So mostly got what i want, because they knew what i wanted.
So ty ppl! Thanks for those who wished me also.
Though i cant really remember.
What to expect when im suffering from
headache the whole day.

So have been having headache after assembly.
Slept while waiting for the band store to be opened
while sitting on a bench.
Thanks for those who asked what happened.
Asyiqin, Zoey Leow, Juniors and Yilin. :D
So during assembling, almost got knocked out.
Cos i was really getting dizzy. Dont seem to be able to
see things straight.
Cant walk fast. Totally looked like Zombie,
and thats bad.
Alright so same old thing.
Diaphragm trg. Rhythm studies.
Sectionals. Combined band and bbt sessions
with successors.
So, during sectionals. the bad part.
I keep running to and fro along the classroom
corridors cos i need to check on ppl.
And the thing is i was trying really hard to run straight.
Since i was still dizzy,
i guess i almost crash into pillars. -.-
What to do. I need to keep things going.
By the time i take time to walk,
people pack up liao.
So right, throughout the whole sectionals,
it was like having pe lessons for me.
Plus, i skipped lunch tdy. Oops.
So not a good day tdy.

Went bbt session after band,
was cool. Haha. So stayed there with Yilin and
Kaibin till 8 plus and home.
And of course, now here.
OH! and bunny, thanks for asking me many times if im okay!
Right. Haha, update again.
Im lazy, bye.

Not okay

Im tired of everything.
I dont know what to do anymore.
I lose my motivation.
I dont know why.
I need time to think.
Problem is, i dont have time to.
Which made me struggle with
studies, tests and band.
I know i need to do well.
But do i have the time to study
to do well.
Because i dont have time to,
i havent been doing well
for everything.
Studies and band.
I dont know whats wrong with me.
Today its the worst day
ever since school reopen.
Due to chem test.
I know i could have do it.
But why i fail to do so.
I dont have the talent to.
Looks like i need to isolate myself
from now on.
I need someone to talk to.
Perhaps i would feel better.
I dont know.
Im feeling super sad right now.
B.D many times tdy.
I know i still cant get over it.
And i know i will need a very long time.
Im feeling drained out ttm.
I need a really long break from everything.
But this brings back to, will i even have the time to.
Im caught in between my emotions.
Sigh. Whatever. I need to cry my heart out.

Sorry Ms chew.
I know you will get a shock upon
marking my paper.
I know you feel really disappointed.
Cos i feel so too.
But whats done is done.
Sorry, i promise not to disappoint you
anymore.

Thanks Mrs. Loke.
For your encouragement.
It mean alot to me.
I really thank you for not giving up
though i always disappoint you.
I promise to work together with you.
And i wont give up.
Thanks.

Mr. Sng
I know you somehow got a shock today.
You know there's a problem with me.
But i really dont wanna B.D in front of you,
thats why i refuse to say anything.
I promise to try to get back up again asap.
Thanks for your concern.

Others
I know almost everyone could tell that
there's something wrong with me.
I didnt want to talk about it.
I couldnt control my emotions.
I dont wish to B.D in front of you all.
Deep down inside, thanks for your concern.

Sorry and Bye.

Freak.

Will update my blog again asap.
Sorry. Bye.

One word to describe life right now.
-Lousy.
I seriously had enough.
I wonder why am i even suffering for you.
Cant you just go away.
I got nothing to tell you, to talk about.
Its more than what you think it is.
Its beyond friendship.
ARGH. I need to yell everything out.
Truly express my emotions.
Everyday im in anger.
I dont see the happiness in life.
Because of you, im not looking forward to school.
I dont know what im aiming for right now.
Isnt my duty now is to be a good musician.
But im think that it is not happening now.
Its the same old routine.
Because the amount of things i need to do
i look like zombie everyday in school.
This is seriously not helping.
You dont seem to ever understand.
You think its as easy and relaxing as what you thought
why dont you try it.
Its been months, i hold on long enough.
Reason being i dont wanna disappoint anyone
or just give up that special chance granted to me.
If i ever look back whats so great about secondary
school life, i will never be able to find anything pleasant.
It just keep going in circles.
I wonder why did i even want to try to hold on
in there when i actually knew the end result.
I dont know who i can pour my troubles out to.
Like who can ever promise to be the one listening
to your problems everytime.
They will be gone sooner or later.
Or who knows, the next minute.
I feel so terrible inside.
Nobody will understand how i feel.
You can claim to know. But is there a point.
You got homeworks, like i dont.
You got problems, like i dont.
You keep repeating how suckish your life is,
who's more.
Tell me uh.
Seriously just shut up and vanish.
Enough is enough.
I dont wanna talk to you anymore, not now at least.
Just leave me alone.
Bye.

Tired

I need to get out of this lifestyle asap.
I need sometime to stop and catch my breath.
Everything is going in such a fast speed.
I got studies, band stuffs and other external activities
to care about.
There's so much to do and yet in such a little time.
I shouldnt give up right now.
So as not to let someone down. :D
Im thinking of what you told me.
Its going round and round in my mind.
Probably after sometime, everything will be okay.
I hope i will get out of this asap, so we will all be fine.

- I want you to succeed.
I will, i should and i must.
-Is it a crime to care about you?
Haha. Epic cool.

Bye.