Not okay

Im tired of everything.
I dont know what to do anymore.
I lose my motivation.
I dont know why.
I need time to think.
Problem is, i dont have time to.
Which made me struggle with
studies, tests and band.
I know i need to do well.
But do i have the time to study
to do well.
Because i dont have time to,
i havent been doing well
for everything.
Studies and band.
I dont know whats wrong with me.
Today its the worst day
ever since school reopen.
Due to chem test.
I know i could have do it.
But why i fail to do so.
I dont have the talent to.
Looks like i need to isolate myself
from now on.
I need someone to talk to.
Perhaps i would feel better.
I dont know.
Im feeling super sad right now.
B.D many times tdy.
I know i still cant get over it.
And i know i will need a very long time.
Im feeling drained out ttm.
I need a really long break from everything.
But this brings back to, will i even have the time to.
Im caught in between my emotions.
Sigh. Whatever. I need to cry my heart out.

Sorry Ms chew.
I know you will get a shock upon
marking my paper.
I know you feel really disappointed.
Cos i feel so too.
But whats done is done.
Sorry, i promise not to disappoint you
anymore.

Thanks Mrs. Loke.
For your encouragement.
It mean alot to me.
I really thank you for not giving up
though i always disappoint you.
I promise to work together with you.
And i wont give up.
Thanks.

Mr. Sng
I know you somehow got a shock today.
You know there's a problem with me.
But i really dont wanna B.D in front of you,
thats why i refuse to say anything.
I promise to try to get back up again asap.
Thanks for your concern.

Others
I know almost everyone could tell that
there's something wrong with me.
I didnt want to talk about it.
I couldnt control my emotions.
I dont wish to B.D in front of you all.
Deep down inside, thanks for your concern.

Sorry and Bye.